SNIP! SNIP! SNIP! (Part 2)

In my head I know two children is enough.  In my heart I get a little sad. 

I am a little sad that I won't get to experience the excitement of taking a home pregnancy test again.  I'm sad that I won't get to experience the excitement of the first OB appointment.  I'm sad that I won't get another first ultrasound and the nervous anticipation of seeing the heartbeat.  I'm sad that I won't get the excitement of having an ultrasound at 20 weeks to find out the sex.  I won't get to pick out names again.  I won't get to experience seeing my newborn baby for the first time.  I must admit I'd like to know what baby number 3 would look like.

I am grateful that I was able to experience pregnancy and childbirth. I am absolutely positively, unbelievably thankful for my sons.  They are amazing!  They make my heart smile every moment.  It's just that the chapter of childbearing has come to a close.  I look forward to all the new chapters (and challenges) of parenting. 

SNIP! SNIP! SNIP!

My husband got snipped today.  I thought about getting my tubes tied but after reading about Post-Tubal Ligation Syndrome, I decided against it.  At my 6 week post-partum check up my blood pressure was ridiculously high.  It was 156/98, which is unusual for me.  Because of my blood pressure being high my OB/GYN refused to put me on birth control pills.

We had discussed vasectomy during the pregnancy with Ethan.  It's less invasive than tubal ligation, it's performed on an outpatient basis, and hell I've had two c-sections, let him take one for the team!  I looked up some stuff about the procedure online and then found a doctor that accepts our insurance.  Mark initially scheduled the appointment for March.  The day before the appointment I told him that I wasn't fully on board.  We had a discussion and went back and forth about what to do.  I told him to keep the appointment.  He insisted on cancelling so that we could discuss the issue further.

Mark is 100% sure that he doesn't want anymore kids.  I'm not 100% sure that I'm done with two.  However, neither of us is getting any younger and money doesn't grow on trees.  While growing up, I always thought I'd have a daughter.  I envisioned two girls and one boy.  My mother has sisters and I have a sister.  The bond of sisterhood is immeasurable.

I had a lot of negative attitudes towards men when I was a child and throughout my twenties.  I remember thinking to myself, "Watch God give me all boys."  Hahahaha!  Well, I was right.  Somebody I used to work with told me, "God doesn't always give you what you want, but he always gives you what you need."  I need my two boys!

I hope and pray that the bond of brotherhood is immeasurable.  Today, I told Aaron that Ethan is his first best friend.